Quality trumps quantity.
It is part of my living with fortunitude 🙂 I have a fortunate attitude and an attitude of great fortune.
Small doses of the best are great for the soul.
Drinking your orange juice in a champagne glass.
Eating on real dishes instead of paper plates.
One small divine piece of chocolate rather than a box of Junior Mints.
I would rather see someone less often and ensure our encounters are meaningful, fun, and of the highest-quality that we can produce than to see him/her every day.
That doesn’t mean anything fancy or money being spent. Quality to me is great conversation, lots of fun, no stress…It could also be highly productive time if work is involved.
It can even be an impromptu conversation in the kitchen, sipping vodka-cranberries, and wearing only underwear (Victoria’s Secret for me, nothing but the best!).
It does include a key ingredient – and that is BEing. Just BE. BEing yourself and BEing in the moment and nothing else matters.
Quality food trumps bulk food.
If I have $20 to spend on the kids and myself for treats, we would rather go out for a high-quality, extremely tasty, decadent dessert that lasts for that one moment, than to go to Target and buy enough M&Ms and ice cream that would last 3 days.
Here’s an example of why –
Last night, Youngest and I prepared our dinner: Grass-fed hamburgers, sauteed fingerling potatoes, broccoli (she did the potatoes) – We ate at home on our balcony. The conversation was excellent – including what she did to make the potatoes (I didn’t help her or hover).
Oldest shared with us some of his favorite stuff that he follows on watchmojo.com – the origins of super heroes and super villains – plus the best voice actors in animation – his mentors and role models since that’s what he wants to do.
We cleaned up dinner and all chilled a bit – then we walked to Whole Foods, where our favorite dessert case is – It’s not going to be low fat or low calories; however, everything is made with real food and real ingredients. And the rule is – pick what you want. We usually get something different so eventually we will have tried everything.
And we enjoy every delicious bite – no hurry, no rush –
Our walk included stimulating conversation about science class and the week at school. Youngest and I have always bonded on walks – laughing and talking – and she still holds my hand.
Pay Myself First
Here is my “pay-myself first” principle that ensures I have quality in my life.
I am a morning person. I love a good sunset but they are hard to catch because I’m either tired or otherwise occupied with something like work.
However, a sunrise is divine and it seems to last longer and is more peaceful – it lingers – the air is still.
I wake up at 4:01 pretty much every day. I’d rather go to bed early if I need more sleep than to sleep in.
The morning is my ME time. It’s my creative time, my exercise time, my fill-my-head-and-soul-with-fine-things time, my quiet time, my music time – whatever I need, I give myself.
I can’t do that after a long day of work and then I’m tired and my head is filled with all the nonsense of the day.
However, in the evenings, I enjoy quality time with other people – friends and family – without stress – as long as I balance some of those evenings with evenings to myself.
My life has great value – and I want it to be the highest quality life I can give myself, so I pay myself first.
I have a small apartment – but it’s really lovely, gated, nice landscaping, quiet – and it’s located within walking distance of my gym, Whole Foods, Starbucks, restaurants.
We felt like we were on vacation sitting on the balcony last night with our dinner. I think real life should feel like that.
I have invited men into my world of small luxuries – It hasn’t work. They end up wanting my ME time for themselves. They want quantity over quality – seeing me all the time – talking about stressful serious things – or wondering who didn’t put the dishes in the dishwasher and spending an hour on a man-hunt to find the source.
I have tried living the Standard American Dream (which I refer to as SAD) – shopping at Costco, living in a 3,000 sq ft house with a pool and dogs and bills and television – chores, to-do lists – and my ME time goes out the window because it’s filled with all this quantity and noise. I don’t enjoy it.
I probably shouldn’t refer to it as SAD because it sounds like I’m judging. I’m really not. I know that people really embrace that, strive for it and love it, and feel content and safe and comfortable.
It isn’t for me. SAD makes me sad and depressed, and my soul withers.
I can’t live that way. It’s not quality to me. It lacks adventure and substance.
To me, quantity is based in fear and insecurity, like you might lose something or might not have it, might have to go without, might miss out on something – constant worry if there will be something or someone there.
It lacks faith or divinity. It lacks value.
How to create some quality for yourself
Find what makes you feel amazing –
Fill your life with people who make you feel uplifted when they are with you AND when they are away from you –
Every day enjoy a sprinkling of the finest you can give yourself without creating debt. It’s ok to go with a little less quantity in order to have some quality.
Pay yourself first – whatever that looks like for you.
Have meaningful conversation and interaction with your kids and friends and significant others. Meaningful does not necessarily mean serious topics.
Seize opportunities of fineness.
I’ve been trying to come up with an example of quantity trumping quality, but I haven’t been able to. If you have an example, I would love to hear it.