Cunning

A-Z Blog Challenge, Day 3

Letter C

Captain Amazing’s request is cunnilingus. Not gonna lie, that’s high on my list too. 🙂

Last year, when I really launched my storytelling for public consumption, I didn’t realize what a diabolically ingenious idea it was, until Captain Amazing started reading it.

I was really nervous actually – putting my renegade thoughts out here – and then having him read them.

He not only reads it…he gets into it. He has quoted me back to me – That’s some kind of awesome!

He said that I make him think –

…and he actually adjusted how he begins certain “quasi-serious” conversations with me because he understands some of my triggers and how I have reacted to them in the past, based on what he has read in this journal-like forum.

Isn’t that every girl’s dream? To have a guy understand her???!!!!

I got what I wanted in a creative manner – and that’s cunning. That’s “art” at its best!

There is a caveat though – I’m not like most girls. He told me the other day that I am “a lot more like a dude” in my thoughts, responses, and actions – not “emotional” as he puts it.

I corrected him and said I’m not volatile or hot-headed. I’m responsive, not reactive. There’s a huge difference.

I’m actually easily teary-eyed by a moving story. I am very aware and embrace my emotions, and I feel them every day. I experience what shows up for me, which is why I’m not volatile or hot-headed.

If more people did that, there would be less anger in the world.

Another guy friend of mine, former Marine, told me that I was born into the wrong gender. It’s an interesting observation. It wasn’t until these two men actually pointed out that I am more “guy-like” that I realized in all of my years on the planet, that’s why I have always hung out with guys.

I’m actually not manly in any way at all – I am just not a typical or stereotypical female. I talk about sex, tell dirty jokes, and I try new things – I get dirty. I go places alone.

What I told Mr. Marine was “No, I’m actually 100% girl, but I choose to live instead of waiting for it to happen – and men have always had that privilege. I choose adventure over sitting around being catty or shopping or doing stereotypical ‘girl’ things.”

I actually joined a sorority in college so I could try to fit in with women – Ironically, I spent more time at the fraternities…

Cunnilingus

Onto the actual requested topic: Cunnilingus: the act of stimulating a woman’s sexual organs with the mouth for sexual pleasure.

I remember the first time a man pleasured me that way – That was a L-O-N-G time ago, BZ (before Zombie), and it surprised me and it was awesome.

Unfortunately, marriage was a long dry spell 😦  I had forgotten that it was even a technique a man and woman could use together.

Zombies do not have great sex – and relationshits suck – figuratively, not literally.

I attended a retreat last summer, which happened to be all women. It wasn’t designed to be, but it was probably better because it was.

So two of the gals admitted to me that they didn’t allow their men (or any man) to go down on them.

They weren’t comfortable enough with their own bodies and their sexuality to allow a man to just play.

It broke my heart.

I had to remember what that felt like, when I was in a relationshit, but thankfully it’s only a memory.

I have days when I’m not so comfortable with my body; it’s a self-image issue that creeps up from time to time, especially right now because my stress level has been quite high during my career transition, and it’s taken a toll – I don’t get to exercise the way I like.

However, I have definitely allowed my sexuality to come out fully, especially in the last few years, but even more so in the last year.

I have the exquisite pleasure of playing out any fantasy I have, or at the very least, expressing it and not have to worry about consequences.

My deepest fantasy really – just to be a toy – And playing back – I’m empowered by giving pleasure and receiving it.

And be comfortable just BE-ing…just to walk around naked comfortably and not care. 

…and not only not care, but to be cared for because I can do that and actually show up and do that.

It’s cunning really – although maybe not, because there is no deception. It’s being fully open, present, receptive and expressive.

How To Receive & Enjoy Cunnilingus

I like to move – I get into it. I also grab the wall, edge of the bed, something. I’ve been tied up too, and I still use my arms. Simultaneously, I relax. 

There should be no thought – This is not a time to plan dinner or redecorate. If that is happening, get out of your head! If you are truly not enjoying it, then you need to speak up. **He wants you to enjoy it – He wants to give you pleasure. Let him! 

Use your voice. When I was a Zombie, voices weren’t allowed, so I understand what it’s like to need to be quiet or being too afraid to speak.

Own it loud and proud! Making noise is better for both of you. 

BREATHE – and let go. As I stated above, it’s empowering to give and receive pleasure, but you have to allow it. Holding your breath stops the flow of pleasure and energy. 

LAUGH – It’s fun! 

**Note, it could be a “she” – no judgment. Same tips apply. 

How To Give & Enjoy Cunnilingus

Um, even though I stated above that I am “guy like,” I have never been on the ‘giving’ side of this technique, so I can’t speak to that. 

I can say that I like a variety of strokes, long and deep. Sometimes too much flick can tickle and become annoying unless and until it is balanced with something else. Please read the “how to receive and enjoy” because that might affect your technique.

Everybody is different. Perhaps a **man will chime in with a specific question or a special technique that he finds useful?? You can be anonymous if you want, although why hide? 

**Or woman, no judgment. 

3 thoughts on “Cunning

  1. My late husband kept wanting to perform cunnilingus on me, and I kept turning him down for it. Partly, it was because he would get 5 o’clock shadow by 9:30am, and partly it was because he never cared for his fingernails, and the very thought of those scratchy nails, rough fingers, and sharp beard stubble down THERE was enough to turn me completely off of it. Also, though, I realize now, I had severe body image issues, and didn’t think it would be pleasant for him. I knew I couldn’t relax with him, either, for fear of scratches and the attending infections from them. And now that I’ve conquered most of my body image issues and I COULD relax with him, he’s gone.

    1. That’s a sad story 😦 However, you have a divine opportunity to honor your journey on the planet as a Goddess in an exquisite body and meet a man who will take your body for a spin 😉 If you feel a new partner is just not in the cards at this point, there are other options for you. OM – Orgasmic Meditation from One Taste is an excellent step to empower your orgasm. I don’t make any money on that recommendation, by the way. I believe in what they do. I am creating my own program, but I don’t think you should wait until mine is done…although you should do mine too ❤

      1. Thank you for the link! I’ll check it out! 😀 I don’t get out much to meet new men, and haven’t got much energy for a romance in my life in any case, so I’ll certainly check out the meditation thing! 😀

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